国外也有段子手:我终于在现实中看到了少林足球的场景

术说足球 术说足球

《阿坤日记》:比赛总须进球,才会获胜。之前总是替补,我也还记得,可是不甚清楚。我翻开首发一看,这名单竟然大不一样,歪歪斜斜的阵容图上写着“阿圭罗”几个字。我横竖睡不着,仔细看了半夜,才从字缝里看出字来,满本都写着两个字是“失点”....

曼城1-2切尔西

Desilostar(尤文球迷)传说门迪连比尔盖茨的婚姻都可以拯救(legends have it that Mendy could have saved bill gates marriage)。

jammzy(切尔西球迷)感谢门迪,之前我从没想过有生之年还能在现实中看到少林足球的场景(All my life I never thought I will see SHAOLIN SOCCER STYLE IN REALITY... Thanks to MENDY)。

madriddna(皇马球迷):图赫尔队瓜帅说,我遇到的光头教练都成了我手下败将(Tuchel to pep be like am beating every bald head manager )。

syd007(尤文球迷)阿根廷人和点球不进,这是比《暮光之城》还动人的故事(Argentines and penalty misses...still a better love story than Twilight)。

slews(切尔西球迷):图赫尔应该把维尔纳关在屋子,让他在黑板上罚写1000遍“我不会越位”(Thomas Tuchel needs to lock Timo Werner in a room and have him write “I will not run offside,” on a chalkboard 1,000 times.)。

Juck(曼城球迷)我觉得瓜帅的儿子应该在和图赫尔的女儿谈恋爱,他对阵切尔西时排兵布阵的方式,也许是他用来商量彩礼的手段(I think Pep Guardiola's son is dating Thomas Tuchel's daughter...the way he sets his starting lineup whenever he plays Chelsea these days... maybe it's his way of trying to negotiate the lobola)。

sozcdilly(利物浦球迷):斯特林在跳水项目中获得了10分(sterling received a perfect 10 for diving)。

拜仁提前夺冠 & 拜仁 6-0门兴

ballchie(曼联球迷)德甲球队向国米请教怎么挑战拜仁(Bundesliga teams to Inter on how to challenge Bayern)。

messimason(巴萨球迷)想办法说服他们签下皮尔洛(find a way to persuade them to sign Pirlo)。

Arbna(切尔西球迷):拜仁夺冠的从赛季第一天就确定了,我不觉得这个消息有什么新鲜的...(It was confirmed from the first day of the tournament. I don't think it's something new....)。

Darzar(热刺球迷)与此同时,拜仁给某三支球队开设了一门公开课—《如何赢得国内联赛》。(Meanwhile bayern teaching open course for three clubs on how to win domestic leagues)。

footymaniac(未知主队球迷):同时恭喜提前赢得第十连冠(congratulations for winning the 10th consecutive title in advance, at the same time)

jeke(未知主队球迷):即使已经夺冠,莱万也要把之前受伤期间没进的球补回来(All goals Bayern were unable to score when Lewy was injured will be scored even after winning the league )。

sidshAU(未知主队球迷):每次莱万射门时,球的反应如下(Whenever Lewandowski hits the ball. The ball be like )。

利兹联3-1热刺 & 利物浦2-0南安普顿

patodihno(阿森纳)热刺恒久远,只有教练变(Tottenham will always be Tottenham..same players same results different coaches.)。

berberbee(尤文球迷):梅森试图修补穆里尼奥留在热刺的烂鞋的样子(RYAN MASON trying to fix broken MOURINHO shoe at TOTTENHAM )。

brun(曼联球迷):试图带飞热刺的凯恩就像停在老旧车库的兰博基尼(Kane trying to carry totenham is like a lamborghini in an old garage)。

proman(曼联球迷)高光时刻!热刺球员试图防守班福德的样子(Highlights! Spurs defender trying to Stop Bamford)。

jackstance(利物浦球迷):比赛中阿利松面对雷蒙德的样子(Alisson to Redmond in the game)。

Rey(利物浦球迷):现在可以叫他“进一个”而不是“蒂亚戈”了(now you can call him Thiagoal rather than Thiago)。

巴萨0-0马竞 

nuucdirty(巴萨球迷):今天的巴萨球迷(Barcelona fans today)。

Rana3291(巴萨球迷):西甲冠军归属决定者:两场比赛前,巴萨;这场比赛前,马竞;这场比赛后,皇马。果然是西甲三强(Laliga title decider:2 games ago: In Barcelona's hand;90 mins ago: In Atletico Madrid's hand;Now: In Real Madrid's hand. really big three in laliga)。

kinglee(阿森纳球迷):这场比赛中双方的门将(both goal keepers in this game)。

Massive(未知主队球迷)注意了,赛后梅西和前队友一起谈笑(attention, Messi laughing with former partner after the Match)。

英语学习

 1.offside/ˌɒfˈsaɪd/ : n/adj/adv 越位

Thomas Tuchel needs to lock Timo Werner in a room and have him write “I will not run offside,” on a chalkboard 1,000 times

2.consecutive  /kənˈsekjətɪv/:adj 连续的,连贯的

Congratulations for winning the 10th consecutive title in advance.

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